Part 4: Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and Mood
Now that you have developed your road map for the changes you’d like to make and you have some experiential understanding of the CBT model for emotions, the next step is to work on understanding, identifying, and monitoring your moods. The reason for this may already be clear: you are most likely reading this workbook because you would like to change how you feel in some way. Perhaps you have been feeling sad, worried, or angry. It might also be that it has been difficult to label the specific emotions you feel. This is a great place to start, and it is very understandable: emotions are complicated!
There are many different ways to feel (moods) in any given moment. Moods can vary in intensity (how strongly you feel them), and they can involve different physical sensations and thoughts. Sometimes, you may feel a combination of many emotions all at once, and it’s difficult to describe or distinguish between them. At other times, it may seem like your emotions have become numbed and you feel nothing. This chapter will help you begin to observe your moods so you can identify how they influence your thoughts and behavior so you can start making the changes you want in your life.
Identifying Emotions
Most of us aren’t accustomed to separating thoughts from emotions. We tend to speak of the two interchangeably, complicating the task of clarifying our emotions. We frequently use the phrase “I feel” to mean “I think.” For example, how often have you heard things like: “I feel like you’re not listening to me” or “I feel like I did a bad job”? Those are actually thoughts, not emotions. Contrast those statements to the following statements of emotions: “I feel ashamed” or “I feel exhilarated.”
Emotions can each be described in one word, and they are variations of the five main categories of emotions: fear, joy, anger, disgust, and sadness. Following is a partial list of different words for emotions:
Frustration Affection Condescension Aggravation Hatred Lust Excitement Empathy Embarrassment Contentment Attraction Malice Desire Disdain Caution Gratitude Horror Panic Doubt Inspiration Anguish Disappointment Hostility Pity Humiliation Confidence Delight Admiration Longing Pride Dismay Enthusiasm Fury Loneliness Scorn Wonder Satisfaction Wrath Relief Jealousy Acceptance Alarm Wariness Apprehension Bitterness Bliss Bewilderment Exhilaration Cheerfulness Contempt Dejection Worry Elation Enthusiasm Ecstasy Melancholy Defiance Glee Nervousness Pleasure Spite Woe Suspicion Dread Jubilation Euphoria… to name a few.
Why Do We Have Emotions?
Why do uncomfortable emotions exist if they seem to give us so much trouble? It’s not uncommon to want to minimize or get rid of some of these painful emotions altogether. We have all, at one time or another, wanted to reduce the intensity of emotional pain or do away with it. It is natural to want to escape pain. But this workbook is not intended to help you ignore or eradicate emotional pain. Why not? Apart from the fact that ignoring or escaping emotions is not a viable long-term solution (as you will learn later on in this book), emotions—even the most painful ones—serve valuable purposes.
There are two main functions that emotions serve:
Emotions serve as signals to ourselves and motivate us to act
Emotions serve as signals to others and motivate others to act
Signals to ourselves: Emotions can act as cues to convey information about a situation. They let you know if something is wrong. Anger can signal that something unfair or threatening is happening. Fear can signal that you are in danger. Sadness can signal the loss of something you care about.
Emotions can then motivate you to act quickly—sometimes before it seems you even have time to think. For example, if you see a car speeding towards you as you cross the street, fear would motivate you to jump out of the way. If someone tried to hurt your children, anger would motivate you to defend them. Disgust might motivate you to throw away rotten food instead of eating it. However, emotions are fallible—meaning they do not always signal actual needs to act. We have all experienced fear in the absence of danger—on thrill rides, watching scary movies, and being startled by loud noises. For this reason, emotional signals to act should not be treated as facts, but they can serve as one source of information.
Signals to others: Emotions can convey information to others about how you feel and how they might respond. Even without speaking, our facial expressions, posture, gestures, and other body language clues telegraph our emotions to other people. If a friend sees you crying, they’ll conclude that you are sad and be motivated to provide support and compassion. When a child sees that you are afraid of spiders, this conveys that spiders are dangerous, and the child will avoid them in the future.
Monitoring Moods
Emotions are important and serve valuable functions, but they can also become overwhelming and unhelpful. This book can teach you to relate to emotions differently to achieve your goals. The first step is to observe and track your emotional experiences. Every day for the next week, take some time to reflect on the emotions that you feel, and record them on the following worksheet. You can set a time each day to think back and record the emotions you experienced (for example, every day after dinner), or you can record them throughout the day. If you choose to record your emotions at the same time each day, it may be useful to set a phone alarm to remind you.
Step One: Write a brief factual description of the situation you were in when you felt the emotion. For example: “had an argument with my spouse” or “thought about all the work I need to do.”
Step Two: Write down the emotions that you experienced in the situation. Use the list of emotion words above to help you label them if you need to.
Step Three: Rate the intensity of each emotion at its peak, from 1 (mild) - 10 (extreme). For example, if you experienced sadness for half an hour that started as mild and progressed to moderate, rate it a 5 to indicate the peak was moderate sadness.
Step Four: Write down the feelings/physical sensations that accompanied the emotions. Did you notice any changes in your heartbeat or breathing? Did you notice a feeling of tension or heaviness anywhere in your body? Did you start sweating or shaking, or feel nauseous, dizzy, or lightheaded? Did you feel hot or cold?
It may be difficult to notice your emotions if you’re not in the habit of observing them. Sometimes, physical sensations can signal that you are feeling an emotion. For example, if you are working on an assignment and suddenly experience tightness in your chest, shortness of breath, and an increased heart rate, that may be a sign that you are anxious. On the other hand, you may be accustomed to feeling “numb” and find it difficult to identify any emotions at all. If this is the case, try to notice subtle, low-intensity physical sensations. Do you feel even slightly different at different times of the day (morning versus afternoon versus evening) or when doing different things (e.g., going for a walk versus watching television versus going to the dentist)?
Track your moods for a full week before moving on to the next module. Most people find it easiest to fill out the worksheet every day at the same time. Consider printing it out and placing it on your nightstand, so you see it at the end of each day. Reminders on your phone can also be helpful. By tracking daily, you’ll quickly develop more emotional awareness and pick up on important patterns in your mood.
Treatment Plans and Interventions for Depression and Anxiety Disorders, Second Edition. The Guilford Press: New York. – Leahy, R.L., Holland, S.J.F., McGinn, L.K. (2011).